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Post by Retread on Sept 14, 2019 17:47:56 GMT -8
If yes how did you get into a relationship when you were younger in middle or highschool. Just want to know because it can be really hard for introverts to do. The slang meaning of introvert seems substantially different from the psychological definition. When most people hear the term introvert they think severe shyness, fear of public gatherings, lack of self-confidence, etc. These are not necessarily traits of introverts. I think introvert vs extrovert is more about whether you work best in quiet contemplation or with lots of external stimuli. Also, if you have nineteen minutes, I think this is worth the time: |
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Nscalerr
Throw me to the wolves and I'll return leading the pack!
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Post by Nscalerr on Sept 14, 2019 23:41:29 GMT -8
Wow great video Retread  I am sort of. Confusing yes, but hopefully the following will explain it. Anthony - The Advocate Code: INFJ-T (Introversion, Intuition, Feeling, Judging) Role: Diplomat I Introversion preferred to extraversion: INFJs tend to be quiet and reserved. They generally prefer interacting with a few close friends rather than a wide circle of acquaintances, and they expend energy in social situations (whereas extraverts gain energy). N iNtuition preferred to sensing: INFJs tend to be more abstract than concrete. They focus on the big picture rather than the details, and on future possibilities rather than immediate realities. F Feeling preferred to thinking: INFJs tend to value personal considerations above objective criteria. When making decisions, they often give more weight to social implications than to logic. J Judgment preferred to perception: INFJs tend to plan their activities and make decisions early. They derive a sense of control through predictability. ** More in the spoiler! Strategy: Constant Improvement
Mind - This trait determines how we interact with our environment.
32% Extraverted 68% Introverted
Introverted individuals prefer solitary activities and get exhausted by social interaction. They tend to be quite sensitive to external stimulation (e.g. sound, sight or smell) in general.
Energy - This trait shows where we direct our mental energy.
66% Intuitive 34% Observant
Intuitive individuals are very imaginative, open-minded and curious. They prefer novelty over stability and focus on hidden meanings and future possibilities.
Nature - This trait determines how we make decisions and cope with emotions.
43% Thinking 57% Feeling
Feeling individuals are sensitive and emotionally expressive. They are more empathic and less competitive than Thinking types and focus on social harmony and cooperation.
Tactics - This trait reflects our approach to work, planning and decision-making.
51% Judging 49% Prospecting
Judging individuals are decisive, thorough and highly organized. They value clarity, predictability and closure, preferring structure and planning to spontaneity.
Identity - This trait underpins all others, showing how confident we are in our abilities and decisions.
43% Assertive 57% Turbulent
Turbulent individuals are self-conscious and sensitive to stress. They are likely to experience a wide range of emotions and to be success-driven, perfectionistic and eager to improve.
Advocate Personality (INFJ, -A/-T)
The Advocate personality type is very rare, making up less than one percent of the population, but they nonetheless leave their mark on the world. As members of the Diplomat Role group, Advocates have an inborn sense of idealism and morality, but what sets them apart is that they are not idle dreamers, but people capable of taking concrete steps to realize their goals and make a lasting positive impact.
Advocates tend to see helping others as their purpose in life, but while people with this personality type can be found engaging rescue efforts and doing charity work, their real passion is to get to the heart of the issue so that people need not be rescued at all.
Help Me Help You
Advocates indeed share a unique combination of traits: though soft-spoken, they have very strong opinions and will fight tirelessly for an idea they believe in. They are decisive and strong-willed, but will rarely use that energy for personal gain - Advocates will act with creativity, imagination, conviction and sensitivity not to create advantage, but to create balance. Egalitarianism and karma are very attractive ideas to Advocates and they tend to believe that nothing would help the world so much as using love and compassion to soften the hearts of tyrants.
Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness. - Martin Luther King
Advocates find it easy to make connections with others and have a talent for warm, sensitive language, speaking in human terms, rather than with pure logic and fact. It makes sense that their friends and colleagues will come to think of them as quiet Extraverted types, but they would all do well to remember that Advocates need time alone to decompress and recharge and to not become too alarmed when they suddenly withdraw. Advocates take great care of other’s feelings and they expect the favor to be returned - sometimes that means giving them the space they need for a few days.
Live to Fight Another Day
Really though, it is most important for Advocates to remember to take care of themselves. The passion of their convictions is perfectly capable of carrying them past their breaking point and if their zeal gets out of hand, they can find themselves exhausted, unhealthy and stressed. This becomes especially apparent when Advocates find themselves up against conflict and criticism - their sensitivity forces them to do everything they can to evade these seemingly personal attacks, but when the circumstances are unavoidable, they can fight back in highly irrational, unhelpful ways.
To Advocates, the world is a place full of inequity - but it doesn’t have to be. No other personality type is better suited to create a movement to right a wrong, no matter how big or small. Advocates just need to remember that while they’re busy taking care of the world, they need to take care of themselves, too.
Advocate Strengths and Weaknesses
Advocate strengths
Creative - Combining a vivid imagination with a strong sense of compassion, Advocates use their creativity to resolve not technical challenges, but human ones. People with the Advocate personality type enjoy finding the perfect solution for someone they care about and this strength makes them excellent counselors and advisors.
Insightful - Seeing through dishonesty and disingenuous motives, Advocates step past manipulation and sales tactics and into a more honest discussion. Advocates see how people and events are connected and are able to use that insight to get to the heart of the matter.
Inspiring and Convincing - Speaking in human terms, not technical, Advocates have a fluid, inspirational writing style that appeals to the inner idealist in their audience. Advocates can even be astonishingly good orators, speaking with warmth and passion, if they are proud of what they are speaking for.
Decisive - Their creativity, insight and inspiration are able to have a real impact on the world, as Advocates are able to follow through on their ideas with conviction, willpower and the planning necessary to see complex projects through to the end. Advocates don’t just see the way things ought to be, they act on those insights.
Determined and Passionate - When Advocates come to believe that something is important, they pursue that goal with a conviction and energy that can catch even their friends and loved ones off guard. Advocates will rock the boat if they have to, something not everyone likes to see, but their passion for their chosen cause is an inseparable part of their personality.
Altruistic - These strengths are used for good. Advocates have strong beliefs and take the actions that they do not because they are trying to advance themselves, but because they are trying to advance an idea that they truly believe will make the world a better place.
Advocate weaknesses
Sensitive - When someone challenges or criticizes Advocates’ principles or values, they are likely to receive an alarmingly strong response. People with the Advocate personality type are highly vulnerable to criticism and conflict and questioning their motives is the quickest way to their bad side.
Extremely Private - Advocates tend to present themselves as the culmination of an idea. This is partly because they believe in this idea, but also because Advocates are extremely private when it comes to their personal lives, using this image to keep themselves from having to truly open up, even to close friends. Trusting a new friend can be even more challenging for Advocates.
Perfectionistic - Advocates are all but defined by their pursuit of ideals. While this is a wonderful quality in many ways, an ideal situation is not always possible - in politics, in business, in romance - and Advocates too often drop or ignore healthy and productive situations and relationships, always believing there might be a better option down the road.
Always Need to Have a Cause - Advocates get so caught up in the passion of their pursuits that any of the cumbersome administrative or maintenance work that comes between them and the ideal they see on the horizon is deeply unwelcome. Advocates like to know that they are taking concrete steps towards their goals and if routine tasks feel like they are getting in the way, or worse yet, there is no goal at all, they will feel restless and disappointed.
Can Burn Out Easily - Their passion, poor patience for routine maintenance, tendency to present themselves as an ideal and extreme privacy tend to leave Advocates with few options for letting off steam. People with this personality type are likely to exhaust themselves in short order if they don’t find a way to balance their ideals with the realities of day-to-day living.
Advocate Relationships
When it comes to romantic relationships, Advocates take the process of finding a partner seriously. Not ones for casual encounters, people with the Advocate personality type instead look for depth and meaning in their relationships. Advocates will take the time necessary to find someone they truly connect with - once they’ve found that someone, their relationships will reach a level of depth and sincerity that most people can only dream of.
Advocate romantic relationships
Getting to that point can sometimes be a challenge for potential partners, especially if they are the impatient type, as Advocates are often perfectionistic and picky. People with this personality type aren’t easily talked into something they don’t want and if someone doesn’t pick up on that, it’s a trespass that is unlikely to be forgiven, particularly in the early stages of dating. Even worse is if a suitor tries to resort to manipulation or lying, as Advocates will see right through it and if there’s anything they have a poor tolerance for in a relationship, it is inauthenticity.
Is This for Real?
One of the things Advocates find most important is establishing genuine, deep connections with the people they care about.
Advocates will go out of their way to seek out people who share their desire for authenticity and out of their way to avoid those who don’t, especially when looking for a partner. All that being said, Advocates often have the advantage of desirability - they are warm, friendly, caring and insightful, seeing past facades and the obvious to understand others’ thoughts and emotions.
Advocates are enthusiastic in their relationships and there is a sense of wisdom behind their spontaneity, allowing them to pleasantly surprise their partners again and again. Advocates aren’t afraid to show their love and they feel it unconditionally, creating a depth to the relationship that can hardly be described in conventional terms. Relationships with Advocates are not for the uncommitted or the shallow.
When it comes to intimacy, Advocates look for a connection that goes beyond the physical, embracing the emotional and even spiritual connection they have with their partner. People with the Advocate personality type are passionate partners and see intimacy as a way to express their love and to make their partners happy. Advocates cherish not just the act of being in a relationship, but what it means to become one with another person, in mind, body and soul.
Advocate Friends
There is a running theme with Advocates and that is a yearning for authenticity and sincerity - in their activities, their romantic relationships and their friendships. People with the Advocate personality type are unlikely to go for friendships of circumstance, like workplace social circles or chatting up their local baristas, where the only thing they really have in common is a day-to-day familiarity. Rather, Advocates seek out people who share their passions, interests and ideologies, people with whom they can explore philosophies and subjects that they believe are truly meaningful.
Closed Book and Speed Reader
From the start, it can be a challenge to get to know Advocates, as they are very private, even enigmatic. Advocates don’t readily share their thoughts and feelings, not unless they are comfortable and since those thoughts and feelings are the basis for Advocate friendships, it can take time and persistence to get to know them. Meanwhile, Advocates are very insightful and have a particular knack for seeing beyond others’ facades, interpreting intent and compatibility quickly and easily and weeding out those who don’t share the depth of their idealism.
In friendship it is as though Advocates are searching for a soul mate, someone who shares every facet of their passions and imagination.
Advocates are often perfectionistic, looking for ultimate compatibility and yet also look for someone with whom they can grow and improve in tandem. Needless to say, this is a tall order and Advocates should try to remember that they are a particularly rare personality type and even if they find someone compatible in that sense, the odds that they will also share every interest are slim. If they don’t learn to meet others halfway and recognize that the kind of self-improvement and depth they demand is simply exhausting for many types, Advocates are likely end up abandoning healthy friendships in their infancy, in search of more perfect compatibilities.
Like Finding a Needle in a Haystack
Further complicating things are Advocates’ eloquence and persuasiveness, which lead to a lot of (unwanted) attention and popularity. Their quiet, determined idealism and imaginative expression naturally draw influence and if there’s anything Advocates avoid, it’s the accumulation of power over others - and the people who are drawn to that type of power. Advocates will find themselves more sought after than they’d ever care to be, making it even more difficult for them to find someone they truly have an affinity with. Really the only way to be counted among Advocates’ true friends is to be authentic and to have that authenticity naturally reflect their own.
Once a common thread is found though, people with the Advocate personality type make loyal and supportive companions, encouraging growth and life-enriching experiences with warmth, excitement and care. As trust grows, Advocates will share more of what lies beneath the surface and if those ideas and motives are mutual, it’s the sort of friendship that will transcend time and distance, lasting a lifetime. Advocates don’t require a great deal of day-to-day attention - for them, quality trumps quantity every time and over the years they will likely end up with just a few true friendships, built on a richness of mutual understanding that forges an indelible link between them.
Advocate Parents
As parents Advocates, much as in their friendships, will tend to look at their relationships with their children as opportunities to learn and grow with someone they care about, while working to achieve a distinctly separate but important goal - raising someone to be an independent, responsible and principled adult. People with the Advocate personality type are unflinching in their devotion to their children, willing to grin and bear any burden without hesitation. While warm and compassionate throughout the parenting relationship, what Advocates are really looking forward to is being able to communicate and relate to the person they helped to raise, as equals.
Be Unique, Just Like Me
As their children grow, Advocates will likely try to project a great deal of their own qualities onto them, demanding the same sort of idealism and honesty that they demand from themselves and maybe even manipulating them into this in their weaker moments. Despite this, Advocates will also push their children to think independently, make their own choices and establish their own beliefs.
The highest goal for Advocate parents is for their child’s choices and beliefs to culminate in a cause that they are able to act on, contributing to the world around them.
If all this independence is taken to heart, it can cause some trouble for Advocate parents though, as their children move into the naturally rebellious phase of adolescence. If Advocates’ children take a contrarian approach, adopting beliefs that violate their parents’ own well-developed principles, Advocates are likely to feel like their children are pointing out their flaws by following another path, a hurtful thing to such a sensitive personality type.
A Job Well Done
Ultimately though, Advocate parents will realize that these conflicting beliefs aren’t a sign of their failure, but of their success in raising someone who did indeed learn to form their own ideals. As they mature, Advocates’ children will also come to appreciate the combination of independence and personal responsibility they were raised with. So long as their child grows up with a firm understanding of the difference between right and wrong and is able to fight for a cause they believe in, striving to be the best they can be, Advocate parents will be satisfied with what they’ve accomplished together with their child.
Advocate Careers
Advocates are likely to find that most corporate career paths are not designed for them, but for those focused on status and material gain. This doesn’t mean that people with the Advocate personality type struggle to see viable options though. In fact, they are likely to face the opposite problem - many Advocates struggle to begin a career early on because they see ten wildly different paths forward, each with its own intrinsic rewards, alluring but also heartbreaking, because each means abandoning so much else.
Truth, Beauty, Purpose
First and foremost, Advocates need to find meaning in their work, to know that they are helping and connecting with people - an Advocate Ferrari salesperson is a non-sequitur. This desire to help and connect makes careers in healthcare, especially the more holistic varieties, very rewarding for Advocates - roles as counselors, psychologists, doctors, life coaches and spiritual guides are all attractive options.
Advocate careers
Advocates’ needs don’t end at meaning though - any productive work can be rationalized to be meaningful, as any productive work helps someone, somewhere. Advocates crave creativity too, the ability to use their insight to connect events and situations, effecting real change in others’ lives personally. For Advocates, money and Employee of the Month simply won’t cut it compared to living their values and principles.
Two Roads Diverged in a Yellowed Wood
These needs are hard to meet in a corporate structure, where Advocates will be forced to manage someone else’s policies alongside their own. For this reason, people with the Advocate personality type are more likely to, despite their aversion to controlling others, establish their independence by either finding a leadership position, or simply starting their own practice. As independents, sole proprietors in the parlance of business, Advocates are free to follow their hearts, applying their personal touch, creativity and altruism to everything they do.
This is the most rewarding option for Advocates, as they will step out of the overly humble supporting and noncompetitive roles they are often drawn to and into positions where they can grow and make a difference. Advocates often pursue expressive careers such as writing, elegant communicators that they are and author many popular blogs, stories and screenplays. Music, photography, design and art are viable options too and they all can focus on deeper themes of personal growth, morality and spirituality.
Where Advocates fall flat is in work focusing on impersonal concerns, mundanity and high-profile conflict. Accounting and auditing, data analysis and routine work will leave people with the Advocate personality type fidgety and unfulfilled and they will simply wilt under the scrutiny, criticism and pressure of courtroom prosecution and defense, corporate politics and cold-call sales. Advocates are clever and can function in any of these fields, but to be truly happy, they need to be able to exercise their insightfulness and independence, learn and grow alongside the people they are helping and contribute to the well-being of humanity on a personal level.
Advocates in the Workplace
Advocates have pretty tall demands when it comes to a satisfying work environment. Not only does this personality type need to be able to express their creativity and insight, Advocates need to know that what they are doing has meaning, helps people, leads to personal growth and, all the while, is in line with their values, principles and beliefs.
Oftentimes the best way for Advocates to achieve this is to not have to answer to others’ rules at all - to be their own boss, neither above nor below anyone else, just directly interacting with the people and ideas that are important to them. All that being said, Advocates are a clever and inspired group and with a few of the right conditions, most any position can be made to work.
Advocate workplace habits
Advocate Subordinates
As subordinates, Advocates are likely to chafe under hardline rules, formal hierarchies and routine tasks. People with the Advocate personality type value diplomacy and sensitivity and the more democratic and personal their manager’s style is and the more they feel their independence and input are valued, the happier they’ll be. Advocates act on their convictions, so when they do something, it’s something that has meaning to them - if those actions come under criticism, even justified complaints, but especially unwarranted ones, their morale is likely to tank spectacularly.
A manager’s values need to be naturally aligned with their Advocate subordinates for both parties to be most effective. Though usually idealistic, if they feel in conflict, Advocates can lose touch with that sense and end up all too bitter. But if it’s a balance they can handle, with a little encouragement every now and then, Advocates will be hardworking, trustworthy and more than capable of handling their responsibilities and professional relationships.
Advocate Colleagues
As colleagues, Advocates are likely to become quite popular, being seen as positive, eloquent and capable friends, identifying others’ motives and defusing conflicts and tension before anyone else even senses a disturbance. Advocates are likely to prioritize harmony and cooperation over ruthless efficiency, encouraging a good, hardworking atmosphere and helping others when needed. While this is usually a strength, there is a risk that others will take advantage of Advocates’ commitment to their responsibilities by simply shifting their burdens onto their more dedicated Advocate colleagues’ desks.
It should also be remembered that at the end of the day, Advocates are still Introverts (I) and their popularity isn’t always welcome - they will need to step back and act the lone wolf from time to time, pursuing their own goals in their own ways. An unhealthy version of this tendency may pop up if Advocates sense that their values are being compromised by a more ethically relaxed colleague.
Advocate Managers
As managers, Advocates are often reluctant in exercising their authority, preferring to see their subordinates as equals, coordinating and supervising people, leaving the technical systems and factual details to more capable hands and working hard to inspire and motivate, not to crack the whip. That’s not to say that people with the Advocate personality type have lax standards - far from it - as Advocates’ sense of equality means that they expect their subordinates to be as competent, motivated and reliable as the Advocates themselves.
Though sensitive, understanding, principled and just, able to appreciate individual styles and to make accurate judgments about others’ motivations, if a subordinate’s actions or attitude undermines Advocates’ ethics or values, they will find little comfort in these qualities. Advocates have no tolerance for lapses in reliability or morality. But, so long as no such lapse occurs, Advocates will work tirelessly to ensure that their subordinates feel valued and happy.
Advocate Personality - Conclusion
Few personality types are as passionate and mysterious as Advocates. Your imagination and empathy make you someone who not only cherishes their integrity and deeply held principles but, unlike many other idealistic types, is also capable of turning those ideals into plans and executing them.
Yet Advocates can be easily tripped up in areas where their idealism and determination are more of a liability than an asset. Whether it is navigating interpersonal conflicts, confronting unpleasant facts, pursuing self-realization, or finding a career path that aligns well with your inner core, you may face numerous challenges that at times can even make you question who you really are.
Advocate (INFJ) personality
What you have read so far is just an introduction and less than 5% of what we can tell you about the Advocate personality type. You may have muttered to yourself, "wow, this is so accurate it’s creepy", or "they know more about me than people I’m closest to". And you may even be a little uncomfortable because you are really not used to being understood.
This is not a trick. You felt understood because you were. And no, we did not spy on you - rather, we spent years studying Advocates’ life stories, experiences and responses to hundreds of our surveys. Step by step, insight by insight, we discovered exactly how Advocates think and what they need to reach their full potential.
This is how we know that many of the challenges you’ve faced and will face in the future have been overcome by other Advocates. You are not alone in this. You simply need to learn from mistakes and successes of others.
But in order to do that, you need a roadmap that fits your needs. Life is too short to stumble around grasping at scattered and contradictory advice that may work for 95% of the population, but not you. We now need to go much deeper into the Advocate mind and answer "why?", "how?" and "what if?"
Are you ready to learn why Advocates act in the way they do? What motivates and inspires you? What you are afraid of and what you secretly dream about? How you can unlock your true, exceptional potential, while also staying true to who you are?
Our Academy provides a roadmap towards a more focused, confident and successful you. It’s not for everyone - you need to be willing to challenge yourself, to face your fears and to ask and answer questions you haven’t asked yourself before. This is not a quick-fix solution, nor an easy shortcut. Our goal is to help you grow and become the person you are meant to be, not to simply give you a comfortable mask to put on. |
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Post by Meryl on Sept 19, 2019 13:30:02 GMT -8
If yes how did you get into a relationship when you were younger in middle or highschool. Just want to know because it can be really hard for introverts to do. Being in a romantic relationship isn't really important in the grand scheme of things. I'm guessing this is what you mean. It'll happen if it's meant to happen. There can be so much pressure to conform to the so called 'norm'. Let me tell you, there IS no norm. Not all of us need or want to be in a romantic relationship...and that's just fine. As long as you are happy and contented with your lot in life, it's all good. My son is 23 and has never had a girlfriend. He has lots of friends who are girls though. I used to worry about him, but he is happy being himself. He has mates, a job, passions and interests. Don't ever feel pressured into getting a partner. However, if you'd like a romantic relationship, start by being a friend, be genuine  I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 17. With hindsight, that was too young! |
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